Time, Attention, and Creativity

I've been giving a lot of thought lately to the new direction Merlin Mann is taking over at 43 Folders. His new focus is less on productivity, and more on "time, attention, and creative work". It makes a lot of sense when you think about it.

What difference does it make if I'm twice as productive, if I'm wasting my time and focusing my attention on something marginal? For widget makers, as long as they can sell the widgets they churn out, I suppose productivity is all they need care about. But what about writers, artists, musicians, and anyone else creative? Wouldn't we all be better off creating something of lasting value, instead of whipping out words (or cartoons, riffs, what have you) no one cares about at the time, let alone three months later?

Yes, a knowledge of how to work more effectively is good; it might mean the difference between a life's work that comprises a single ten thousand page novel exploring the meaning of life, or two ten thousand page novels... Seriously, I do think some effort to improve work habits, learn to get things done more quickly, and so on, does pay off, if only in a bit more time to do the things you really want to.

In my opinion, the important difference is in the effect your efforts have. If they do leave you more time to do the important work, they're worth keeping up. If you're just losing a lot of time downloading cool software you'll use once and forget, you'd probably be happier doing something else. Yes, you have to allow room for mistakes; that's part of the learning process.

The point isn't to be so cautious, so miserly with your time, that you avoid all mistakes. Almost nothing is truly wasted when real creativity is applied to extracting some meaning from it. The point is to remain aware, to stop the experiment as soon as you've learned it is a mistake, instead of going ahead out of habit, or some sense of duty.

How do these thoughts apply to my blog? I haven't fully decided yet whether or not Blogger will remain its permanent home, but I will keep a blog. I will try to post to it with something approaching semi-regularity. As I learn to focus my time and attention where I want them, I may even do a better job of posting. What I won't do is spend much time writing "filler" posts. Either I'll write a post on an issue I'm trying to work out my own thoughts on, as in this case, or I'll post about something I believe may be of real value to my readers, which I also hope this post may prove to be, if it gets you thinking as well.

If you do start thinking about this, remember, the point isn't to focus your time and attention in the place I think it ought to be, or anyone else, for that matter. The point is to make up your mind where you believe your efforts will best be spent. If you're at all creative, you ought to be able to find someplace fulfilling to spend your energies.

An Interesting Contest (and A Reminder)

Over at a new blog I just read, called This Eclectic Life, there is an interesting contest for writers. It is called the "This Post Blows My Dress Up Contest". Write a post on the theme "Scared Silly" and go on over to let her know you're entering the contest. The contest announcement and complete rules are listed on the blog.

Be sure to read the complete rules, and remember, the contest closes at 12:00 noon, Texas time (which is GMT minus 5 hours, for my international readers), on Friday, the 28th of March. The prize is $30.00 added to your PayPal account, which is as much as many short fiction markets pay, so it is worth entering! If I can get something written and up here in time, I hope to enter myself.

Even if you don't win (and I won't be holding my breath, if I manage to enter), writing a scary story will be fun, and as long as someone reads it and enjoys it, your efforts won't be wasted. I don't think most of my readers know This Eclectic Life, so it is also a chance for you to check out a new and interesting blog.

In the meantime, don't forget the very multi-talented DBA Lehane's contest, over at RedBubble (you'll need to sign up), and announced on Short Short Fiction. Do note that if you join Twisted Tales at RedBubble, the announcement there has been updated, and the Like We Did Last Summer contest deadline has been extended.

The Wandering Author Returns

I truly did not plan to be away so long. On New Year's Day, when I'd hoped to post, I discovered my firewall software had auto-updated and was now fighting it out with my anti-virus software. I located and downloaded a new firewall program, only to confront the fact that something, whether the "security wars" or a long-time accumulation of junk in my system, had left my system dangerously unstable. Roughly half the time I booted up, the system froze immediately on reaching my Desktop.

After a few weeks of tweaks, fiddling, removing a few fonts, clearing out junk from the Registry, and all those other fun things that keep Windows systems above water a little longer, I had a bit more luck, but I was still not too confident. So I began trying to go through all my software (yes, you say, that is the problem) so I could restore my system to the condition it was in when I bought it, then reinstall only the programs I need.

In the middle of that, the Brisbane flu paid me a visit, despite the flu shot I got last fall. February passed in a haze of fever, while I've been frantically trying to finish going through my software (I have about 200 CD-ROMs, and much more downloaded freeware), work, catch up with everything else in my life, and fit in a little writing.

Ah, yes, writing. I can discuss it a little more now. My friend Jim, who my wife and I found dead on his kitchen floor last September, wanted to write as well. He was one of the most intelligent people I've ever known, and I always assumed he was a better writer than I was. I never dared show him anything of mine, because I was too much in awe. He always said his stuff was crap, or worse, but we all say that, and since he was embarrassed to show it to me, I didn't press the point.

After he died, we found a few creative writing courses, but not a single word Jim had written. He was so unhappy with it that he destroyed it all at some point. Between the shock of finding him, then finding out he'd destroyed all trace of his writing (and I guarantee you, far worse than anything he ever turned out since the age of ten has been published), I was unable to write at all.

I struggled with attempts to force myself to do writing exercises, or to write a story as a tribute to Jim, but no words would come; anything I got on paper was jumbled and useless. I'm not just being down on my work here; it really wasn't half as good as I know I can do. I decided to sign up for the two year novel writing course at Forward Motion, in hopes that would get me jump started.

I'm happy to say, it worked! I've got a very tiny start on a new novel, and plan to keep going until it's done. I'll be doing other writing as well, of course, now that I can again. Trying to keep up with assignments is one thing that's kept me away; that, and the residual exhaustion from the flu.

I had hoped to make a grand return, and fix all my broken links, clean up the template, and start posting regularly - all at once. That isn't going to happen. I need to start slowly, and I need to consider exactly where I'll go with this blog, and my online presence in general. Everything that has happened has just hardened my determination to be a writer. I will keep at it until I am published, or die trying.

In addition, Jim's cat, Julius, is doing well, which is a good thing - he is one of the sweetest cats I've known. Yet that means continued vet bills to keep him as healthy as possible; bags of IV fluids, medications, visits. So I do need to begin looking for a way to bring in a little more income than I am. I hope to do it in a way that will be fair to all my readers; you won't see a sudden explosion of ads for all kinds of junk.

I'll discuss those plans later, and a few ideas I have for making a bit of money by writing. I just wanted to let you know I was alive; Lehane's efforts to drag me out have had their effect, of course. (The subtle signs are all there, even if he denies it. Lehane is to blame for my return, no matter what he says.) I'd started a humourous story in which Lehane entered cyberspace in an effort to find me and drag me out, but I haven't managed to finish that.

I won't be posting all that regularly right at first. One of the things I've been trying to catch up on, which has kept me exhausted, is helping Jim's son as far as I can with the probate. He has an interest in some land, and I looked up the records on it for him to save him the lawyer's fees. It was a good thing I did! I had to sift through nearly two dozen deeds on the property to get to where I could make any sense of the tangled trades back and forth within the family.

In fact, this isn't much of a post. I simply remembered my blog (I needed the URL, and that got me thinking), missed it, and sat down here to let my thoughts flow out of my fingers in this long, rambling fashion. I do hope to do better soon. I have plans, either for this blog or a new web site, to make it a more useful resource for writers. There are a few areas I'm pretty good at, and I hope I can help some of the rest of you in those areas. I will also be catching up on previous projects that lost ground between my sickness last year and Jim's death. I hope my regular readers will gradually notice that I'm back, and put up with me until I get the hang of writing directly from the keyboard, with little or no editing, once again.

Lessons, and a General Update

Lesson One

The most surprising lesson I've learned over the past few months is this: if you are forced to exhaust yourself, be careful when promising yourself rest. Once you set your mind on a certain date, and allow yourself to fully slow down - your body will rest, and leave you little choice! Although I was functioning normally when we found Jim, I had used up many of my reserves, and had not yet got as far as restoring those reserves.

I worked to the point of utter exhaustion, always promising myself that I would be able to rest once November arrived. Even after I caught bronchitis, I forced myself to keep going, with the same promise. Well, we did finish on time (last junk out of the apartment about 11 pm on the 31st of October, packed and pulling away from the curb about 11:30 pm - how's that for cutting it close?) and November arrived.

I assumed I would rest, but that I'd also begin getting back to normal. Instead, I learned what it must be like to have narcolepsy. I was so exhausted, and I'd primed myself so much to expect that I could now rest, that my body kept forcing me to sleep, no matter what I intended. I could only accomplish anything in snatches; I often fell asleep so quickly that (for example) while reading I'd suddenly wake when the book slipped out of my hand and hit the floor.

I finally caught up with my sleep enough to be able to stay awake, but I can feel I have still not rebuilt all my reserves. If I stay up too late, I can feel exhaustion dragging at me. I'm mostly over the bronchitis (the asthmatic part is always the last to go, so I still get short of breath easily), and there is no reason for anyone to worry about me (although it does warm my heart to know that my readers care about me), but I am really anxious not to wear myself out quite so badly the next time Life drops a surprise in my lap.

Lesson Two

When he died, Jim still had a lot he wanted to do, and a lot of plans he'd never fulfilled. He expected to have years left to do these things; sadly, that was not the case. I can't restore that chance to him, much as I'd like to, but I can try to learn from his death, and to help my readers learn as well. Life is precious, fragile, and fleeting. Always try to live as though you had only a few weeks or months left.

Sure, there are still things you need to do that aren't what you most want to do. Errands, boring tasks, and the like weigh on us all, and some of them really do have to get done. But, insofar as you have the chance, try to take care of the most important things first. Let the lesser things slide. If the next day, you felt yourself dying, what would you most regret having neglected? What would you regret less? Try to live according to that sense of what matters. No matter how long you have to live (and I hope, for all of you, it is a long and a pleasant life), you'll have fewer regrets.

Lesson Three

Many of you may already know this, or it may seem obvious, but when you are in shock you won't always think clearly, so it is good to have this firmly in mind. Whenever someone dies, whoever will be dealing with their possessions will find, among everything else, an appalling lot of stuff that simply has to be disposed of. If that person lived in an apartment, costs of keeping it are much higher, so the job must be finished much more quickly.

At least in Massachusetts, some kinds of trash are hard to dispose of. At once, find out the local rules for trash disposal, and take full advantage of every trash day as it comes. The most costly items to get rid of are: TVs, computer monitors, computers, and the like, appliances, and mattresses. Give away what you can. Throw away any of these things you are allowed to at no cost. And try to find a good, inexpensive "junk man". Paul, the guy we used, charged less than half what the heavily advertised services would have.

Update

I learned several other lessons, but I'm not posting those now. They would involve discussing aspects of Jim's life that were personal to him, and I don't want to say anything that would have made him uncomfortable. So, if I post them to this blog at all, it will have to be after more thought.

The length of time I've been away from the blog was partly due to sleep's forceful takeover of my life, but it was also due to a few instances of Murphy's Law. One of the few tasks I attempted, once I saw how things were, was something I thought I could do in short bursts. I changed all my passwords so they would be more secure, and switched to a new password management system. In the process, I managed (and now that I'm awake, I could have predicted this!) to spoil my access to several sites.

In no case was the damage permanent; there are always options. But, having read that many people were having trouble with their G-Mail accounts, I first assumed my failure to open any Google site was due to the same type of problem. Of course, it was obvious that wasn't the case, but until I woke up and calmed down enough to think clearly about it, I didn't see that.

In addition, there was another death in my family; my father's cousin, who was more like an aunt to me. Ruthie was 95, and had spent the last few months in a nursing home trying to recover from pneumonia, so it wasn't totally unexpected, but when she died the day before Thanksgiving, it was still a blow. She was a very sweet woman who always seemed as if she'd outlast everybody else.

Jim's Cat

Some of you will have noted that I ended up keeping one of Jim's cats; the oldest, who he loved more than anything. Julius had kidney disease, a thyroid problem, bad teeth, and a bronchial rasp, in addition to being overweight and seventeen years old. In other words, no one else would adopt him. My tiger kittens have accepted him, mostly, although my son's cat still thinks he's Satan, come to take over his position as "big cat".

Julius, for his part, is a sweet guy who doesn't want to fight any of them. He's tried to make friends, but Mandarin seems to regard this as a cunning plot to buy time. So, for the time being, they must be kept mostly separate. It is not so much that they actually fight, but rather that Mandarin's continual hostility causes Julius too much stress. He won't even eat in Mandarin's presence.

At the time we brought him home, his kidney disease was being treated by nothing more than diet. For those of you lucky enough to have never had a cat suffering from kidney disease, I should explain that this diet is bland and apparently utterly devoid of appeal. Although they are fed separately, Julius knows the other cats get better stuff, and isn't inclined to settle for boring slop. So he wasn't eating much at all. Usually, if you hold out for a few days, a 'starving' cat will give in.

We tried that with Julius, but it didn't seem to work well. Ultimately, it turned out the food issue was camouflaging another problem. One of his bad teeth became abcessed, and was so painful he couldn't eat solids at all. The teeth can't be operated on; he's too old and sick to tolerate the anaesthesia. Penicillin did clear up the infection, for now, and he's eating again.

He lost enough weight, quickly enough, that it led to a condition, common in older cats who lose weight quickly, which could threaten his liver. So he couldn't afford to lose any more weight. Briefly, he was back on "real" food - now, with vet approval, he's on a mixture of "kidney food" and "real" food, with a few very high quality treats thrown in.

The real tragedy in all this is the fact that, due to the stress, infection, loss of weight, or some combination of factors, his kidney disease has worsened to the point where he is now on sub-cutaneous fluids, 200 ml twice a week. Giving them to him is an ordeal. He struggles, but makes no effort to hurt us, but he does stare at us, bewildered, wondering why we are doing this to him.

We, of course, know that he'd suffer far worse without the fluids. We can see the difference in him after each treatment; the surge of interest and energy, then a gradual slowing down as the next treatment nears. It is still a difficult thing to deal with. Although it doesn't cause him any pain, it does create considerable temporary discomfort when the fluid, which is of course always slightly cool even after warming, and thus feels "wrong", bulges up under his skin before being absorbed.

Worst of all, any of you who have dealt with kidney disease will know what is implied. If he's on fluids twice a week now, in a while that will get worse, and it will be every other day, then every day... Even now, multiple vet visits before we got him straightened out, 'runs' to the vet to pick up fluid, and all the other little things involved, played their part in keeping me from blogging sooner.

NaNoWriMo

As I implied earlier, I didn't join NaNo this year with any real hope of success. I simply couldn't bear not to participate. Well, I did participate, a very little, but I was seldom if ever on the boards, and my word count is so laughable I may as well not post a total. I couldn't snatch much time between sleeping, taking care of Julius, and trying to undo the messes I made while too sleepy. Next year, I hope to take part, and again to win, if all goes well.

The Future

I am, of course, paying attention to Lesson Two, above. The most important thing in my life is my cats. After that, there is my writing. Blogging is a part of writing. So I don't intend to give up blogging. However, I am going to be very busy for a while taking care of a very sick cat, and if I want to stay in any shape to write, I need to take time to rest, and also to get more exercise and fresh air so I can build up my health.

What all this means is that I will still be here, but, for the time being, not as often. I'm not going to promise to post with any specific frequency; there are too many uncertainties right now. As I am able, I will try to post here, and to write stories (or post ones already written) for those of you who are waiting. I will also, more slowly than I intended, clean up my template and post about the ideas I had earlier this summer.

But, since I'd rather take it easy now than be forced to quit later, I'm only going to do these things as I can fit them in. I look forward to a time when I can spend more time blogging, but right now I can't say exactly when that will be. I will visit your blogs when I can, enjoy reading them, and try to leave a few comments so you know I'm not ignoring you. But, again, I won't be taking as much time to read the blogs I enjoy as I have in the past, not until I have the time to spare for that.

Take heart in this: by the time I can get back into the full swing of blogging, I'll be longing for it! In fact, I'm longing for it now; I'm just trying to make the best long term decision that I can. I apologise for a long and rambling post; I hope my next one will be much better and more interesting than this.

One Year Blogiversary

Please forgive me the awkward word coinage (or perhaps someone else has already used that form; I can't recall if I've seen it elsewhere) in the title. I had hoped to have a more special post up today, but as it happens, I am so sick that I am barely managing to post at all.

We've been having high heat and humidity, and a combination of unwise but not immediately catastrophic decisions have left me exhausted from the heat and severely dehydrated. I tend to have a problem with dehydration anyway; I simply seem to need a lot of liquids. This isn't your garden variety dehydration, though, with a massive headache that will go away once you drink enough.

So I couldn't quite forget to post on the one year anniversary of my blog, but all I can really manage to say is that I'm weak and exhausted and unable to manage much tonight. (In fact, Monday evening is the first time I've logged onto my computer since very early Friday morning - really late Thursday night - when the problem began.)

I will be posting more about the changes I plan, in the near future, just as soon as I am feeling slightly better. Thanks for your patience and your feedback on my earlier post.

I'm Back With Thoughts of Change

I've actually been back a short while, but too busy catching up with everything that I fell behind on to post here until tonight. Thanks for all your suggestions: this time, oddly enough, the trouble wasn't either Blogger or Windows - it was Firefox! More specifically, one of my Firefox add-ons seems to have become a little too possessive of the contents of each tab - it was literally preventing any tab I opened from being refreshed at all.

This blog will be one year old on the 30th, and I'm still pondering what I'll do by way of celebration. In addition, I'm considering a few changes - nothing is final yet, I do want to keep my friends and loyal readers coming back, so I'll discuss this further before making a decision, but I wanted to at least toss out my thoughts for now. Feel free to express your opinions in the comments here or in any later post on the subject.

In fact, I'd actually appreciate your comments. After all, if I were simply writing for myself, there'd be no need to post it here. I've made some friends I value in the blogging world, and I don't want to do anything to lose you. The first change I'm thinking of is very simple - I may leave this blog up, but open a WordPress blog, copy at least the best of my posts here over there, then continue blogging at a new address.

This will mean a lot of you changing your links, which I know can be a real pain. I haven't finally made up my mind to do it - I also know for bloggers who have a home on Blogger, it is harder and more time consuming to leave comments on WordPress blogs. On the other hand, WordPress does offer stability and some features I think might make my own life that much easier. I may also run two, 'mirrored' blogs for a short time, just to see how each one works out.

The most likely change is this - wherever I continue to blog, I need to update my layout and links soon. Over time, the blog has become a bit messy, and I plan to improve that, while also pruning dead links, adding the members of the Shameless Lions Writing Circle to my blogroll, etc. I may also add a link section for interesting sites I come across or learn about.

Finally, I've been considering my writing career, and joined Forward Motion, the writing community, a short while back. Reading the posts there has left me reconsidering how I plan to proceed. I will still be posting new stories here, (or on my new WordPress blog), but I'm trying to decide on a framework that is fair to you, my readers, and to me as well.

My current thinking, which is far from settled, involves two things - I may post excerpts, clearly labeled for those who wish to avoid becoming caught up in them, plus a more regular schedule of posting stories, say one per month or perhaps, if I feel I can meet the schedule, every two weeks. For the latter stories, I am considering allowing my readers to post ideas, prompts, types of stories they'd like to see - each time, I'll choose one, write the story, and post it.

I'll discuss all this further before making any real changes, but I wanted those of you who visit here to have some idea what was going on, so you can watch out for my later post on the subject, probably within a week or two. What you are reading here is my late night, rough summary of all the thoughts that have been going through my head lately.

A Few Days Left Before the "Friends of Kilroy" Gonzo Blog Carnival

The Queen of Pentacles is hosting a Gonzo Blog Carnival: Friends of Kilroy. The actual carnival is 02 July, but entries must be in by 30 June. Blogs with a link exchange to Fear and Loathing or to any of the bloggers linked there, such as the Unending Journey, are eligible. You can read the complete rules at the link above.

Even with the lingering effects of the flu, and the awful heat wave we're having here right now (all three cats are miserable - poor Tristan sprawls out, then gets up and starts 'yelling' - he wants us to do something about the heat - even his sister, who usually doesn't mind the heat, is sprawled out in 'lifeless overheated kitty' pose, and that at 3 am when it should be cooler), I will probably manage an entry myself. If I can't write one, I'll pull a story out of my files and post it.

So, come on, jump in and join the carnival. It's a great way to get new readers, make new friends, and find interesting new blogs to read.

Final Words to the Blogosphere

I've dreaded this moment ever since I learned the new Bonehead-Lamebrain Anti-Terrorism Bill would shut down the entire blogosphere just in case somewhere in those billions of words there might be a scrap of information terrorists could make use of. It is just like politicians to offer a "solution" that does nothing to fix the problem. Or perhaps they're smarter than I think; they've done a very good job of making it difficult once more for any member of the public to gain wide exposure for an observation like mine.

There are a lot of people out there cheering, people who consider the blogosphere a waste of time or worse. To them I say, no one ever forced you to keep a blog, or to read anyone else's blog. Blogging is a far more pleasant way to waste time than most of the ones I know. And I don't believe it really is a waste of time at all. The founders of the United States, the men who drew up our Constitution, believed free speech was important.

Their experiment turned out so well, many other societies became convinced freedom of speech was important, too. Well, blogging is the most perfect outlet for freedom of speech man has ever imagined. Anyone, even the nutjob over there wearing his tinfoil hat to block the mind control rays his neighbour's squirrel is beaming to him, can say whatever they want on their blog. And yet, bloggers don't annoy you walking down the street, they don't litter your lawns with hate-laced filth, they don't make any real fuss or mess. You don't have to read a single blog if you don't want to.

So blogging offers perfect freedom of speech to everyone, while offering perfect freedom of attention to everyone else. No one ever has to read about that squirrel and his mind control rays. No one ever has to read flimsy excuses for hatred. Everyone can read whatever they please. If tinfoil hats amuse you, you can learn how to make one. And everyone can respond to whatever they read; if you find a nasty, hateful blog, you are able to counter it by writing sane and tolerant posts of your own.

Yes, there are a few things we should not tolerate, but for the most part, tolerance is a necessary part of society. Blogging nurtures tolerance, as bloggers link to one another and have the chance to read very different opinions from their own. It gives everyone a voice, and lets the rest of us understand how others live. It sometimes allows strangers to help each other, which is surely a good thing.

It offers the chance to understand things you've never even thought about, to learn about things you knew nothing about, and to discover writers and artists you otherwise never would have heard of. It offers obscure people the chance to share their talents with the world, and gives the best of them some opportunity to have those talents recognised. No matter how many or how few bloggers understand this, what we do is the essence of freedom, of equality, of growing understanding.

And, of course, for a writer or anyone who ever even thought about writing, blogging is paradise. It offers a free, easy way to write and to publish your words in a forum where others will read them and respond. Those are the things we will all lose when the blogosphere is shut down tomorrow. Let us remember them, let us never forget them, let us struggle day and night to bring them back.

Some of you will remind me, if you have time to leave a comment, that there are nasty bloggers, and petty bloggers, foolish ones and vain ones. All that is true; bloggers are part of the human race, and we share the bad traits as well as the good. Yet blogging has given us a tool, one that can do great things if used wisely. If you look back and wish you'd done better, learn that lesson well. If we do somehow keep our right to blog, the lesson you learned will help you make better use of the tool before you.

On a more personal level, I will hate to leave the blogosphere behind. There are so many blogs that make me think, and there are hidden jewels of fiction, or poetry, however painful. And when I ache with a suffering poet, I hope one day to read she has escaped the Monster and is free to live. I want to know how all your lives turn out!

I will miss the blogs I read, I will miss my readers, I will miss the act of blogging. If only it were not true, the idea of the blogosphere coming to an end would be an instructive one, for it has made me think of all blogging is, and all it means to me. In the time I've been blogging, I've deleted one or two really awful comments, and responded to one or two hurtful ones. But it has all be worth it to me, and I will leave with many more happy memories than sad ones.

My only real regret as the last day of blogging approaches is this: I regret the days I never posted, I regret the days I could have said something but stayed silent. I will think of all of you, and remember you fondly, and hope your lives all turn out well. And, if by some miracle the blogosphere is saved, I'll link you up once again with a light heart. And I know I have friends now in places I've never even been, and that is a wonderful thing.

So I say to everyone who has the chance to read this; look at all the things blogging has to offer you. Look at all it can offer those around you, and all it can offer the world at large. Obscure fringe groups have the chance to be heard, and perhaps make themselves understood. The sick, the shy, the ugly, the awkward, all have another chance to make friends. Bloggers can band together to do good, to spread important words, to offer comfort.

Remember those things. Remember the blogosphere is as real as any other part of human interaction, and every blogger is a real person. You say some people pretend to be what they're not on their blogs? Of course they do; some people pretend to be what they're not in other ways, too. No fair criticism of bloggers or blogging cannot be said about other aspects of human life as well. So remember what we have here, wake up and see it for what it is. Work to save it, restore it, improve it, to make it everything it can be.

In conclusion, as you must surely realise, I very much hope these will not be my final words to the blogosphere, and pray that awful Act will be overturned by the Supreme Court at the last moment. I urge you all to support a Constitutional amendment guaranteeing everyone the Freedom to Blog. And I hope to be back at my keyboard, posting again. If that is not to be, I only regret the fact it has ended. Even the pain of losing the blogosphere is not enough to make me wish I had never discovered blogging. I will miss you all, and I will think of you, as I write in my paper journal, such a very poor substitute for the real thing, blogging.

Tish, from The Kat House, tagged me for a rather interesting meme, which asks each blogger to consider "If the blogosphere were coming to an end 24 hours from now, what would your final post be?". Even though Tish dismissed the greatest Web 2.0 tool of all time, not even including it in a Web 2.0 meme she participated in, I still have no choice but to forgive her. After all, she was very complimentary in her comment when she let me know I'd been tagged.

I'm also very grateful to Tish, since writing this post has made me think. I could only think of one reason (short of the impending extinction of the entire human race) I could know the blogosphere would come to an end in 24 hours. That's right, politicians! Those people who make a mess of everything good trying to fix the bad, without ever really improving anything. And when I thought about the possibility they might take all this away, I realised just how much I would miss it. The words above are real, they are exactly what I would say in such a situation, well, except for the much more unkind comments I'd slip in about the politicians who were responsible for it all...

Yes, it is traditional in a meme to tag others. The trouble is, I'm never sure if the person I'm tagging would really like to be tagged. So I'll say this; I've found the meme to be a valuable prompt to force me to think about blogging and what it means to me. If you read this, and would like to participate, consider yourself tagged!

One Hundred Posts

I just noticed this is my hundredth post, but I'm not in any state to celebrate. I'm posting to let those of you who read my blog know I somehow managed to become severely dehydrated during the sudden heat we're having. I have worked on stories both days, but cannot manage to finish them with a headache that feels like a rusty axe is being slammed into my skull.

So, for those of you expecting to find stories, I'm sorry. I'll make up any stories I miss, either by posting several a day in May, or continuing on into June. So I will still write 31 stories, and as quickly as I can. I just need to take a day or two off to let the headache go away.

Things To Look Forward To

Tomorrow, as I promised below, I will be posting the Five Blogs That Make Me Think, thanks to Miss Kitty. I hope that on Wednesday, I will be able to post my replies to Beth's interview questions. In the meantime, I'm taking on an interesting project proposed by French Toast Girl.

Her idea was to do something creative every day in May. I am not absolutely certain I can keep up with that, but if I publicly announce I'm going to do it, I will give it my best shot. So, here it is; every day in May, I hope to post a poem or story I've written that day. If I can't keep up that pace, and finish something a particular day, I will follow French Toast Girl's suggestion, and work on it that day, then the next, and post it as soon as I can finish.

A Child Without A Voice - Update - What's Needed

I posted recently about a project to help a four year old boy who cannot talk, due to apraxia. Many of my readers volunteered to help, and I'm grateful for that. I wanted to let you know how things are going so far, and what more you could do to help if you're willing.

First of all, I understand it takes time to write a story, and you need to do a good job, so this book will sell. But I also wanted you to understand how urgent this is: if you read Anna's most recent post, her county has decided they "don't have the money" to give her son even the minimal services he was getting. This is a boy who tries to say something, then hits himself in the head because he hears it come out wrong! But I'm not going to waste time discussing the cruelty of that decision - it's much more important to do something as quickly as we can.

First of all, those who have offered to write stories, there is no specific deadline. Write them as you can, then send them to me. As soon as I'm able, I publish the book, and, if enough additional stories come in, I'll publish a second volume. If by some miracle, we bring in enough money to give Alexander (Red) everything he needs and money is still coming in, well, there must be other kids out there like him.

I understand this is a difficult subject, but I'm simply asking that you send in your stories as soon as you finish them. In addition, I'd really appreciate it if all of my readers would let as many writers as possible know about this. That will cost you no money and little effort. The more people we have trying, the sooner we can start raising money. Susan Abraham, in the comments to the original post, kindly offered to put a button like the one I have up on her own blog. If any of you are willing to do this, I can send you the link and code (for Blogger at least).

If someone knows how to adapt the code for other blogs, that would be helpful. And the image isn't displaying as clearly as I'd hoped. I tried creating an actual size image instead of having it resized, but that turned out worse. So, if someone knows more about web graphics than I do (I'm more used to print), a better button, or at least some advice, would really help as well.

If any of you know a good artist, I want to create the best book cover I possibly can, and I could use a lot of help there. Finally, I still need legal help. Jason was kind enough to make a suggestion, in the comments to the original post. His idea was to simply have every writer sign over all rights to Anna, so she could just sell the book and get the money.

If we can't do anything else, and Anna agrees, this is a possibility. I didn't consider it originally for several reasons. First, I suspect Anna would then have to pay taxes on the income from the book, and keep all the paperwork. I was hoping to spare her that. I'm not a lawyer, but I was hoping there was some option similar to the funds banks set up after a family has a bad fire.

Another reason I didn't consider this is because I felt it might be harder to sell the book, if the proceeds aren't going to a "real" charity. Personally, I don't care if Anna and her family get every cent; I'm sure she'll use the money to help Red. If there's a little left over, so what. But some people might not be as likely to buy the book - I felt if it was set up so any surplus went to, say, an organisation that helps kids with apraxia, they'd be more likely to buy it.

For that matter, if you sell a book saying you're raising funds for something or other, and don't have a "real" charity set up, I don't know if you can be charged with fraud. So one way or another, I've got to make sure this works from a legal standpoint. If any of you know someone with a blawg, please point them here, or consider writing a post about this.

The Copyright issue is another problem. I didn't consider having everyone assign all rights because I know many writers would balk at that. At this point, I don't even care, which will tell anyone who knows me just how determined I am to get this done. But, that isn't the problem anyhow. There are standard agreements that assign rights for a single project while allowing the author to keep other rights.

The problem is, we have volunteer writers from several countries already, and I don't know if those standard agreements cover this situation. This is the Internet! These situations are going to keep coming up; I should think some enterprising lawyer would like to blaze a trail here! It was also suggested that I contact a law school, to see if I can persuade them to help me pro bono (lawyerspeak for no charge); I'm going to start that process, but I suspect there might be looong formalities involved.

Thanks to all of you who have helped, and are helping, I really appreciate it. I just really want to do everything possible to make this work, and work with as few delays as possible. If you have ideas, suggestions, comments, please share them. The only thing that is important right now is getting Alexander the help he needs as quickly as we can. If you think I'm being an idiot, point it out! I'd rather find a way to do this right away than have anyone spare my feelings.

Apologies

I want to apologise to everyone for the long delay in posting. Originally, I wanted to leave the previous post on top for a while, to get exposure. I intended to announce the winner of the Wandering Author Longer Fiction Contest on the first of April. But, before I did that, I wanted to create a nice, visible button to link to the most recent post in my efforts to help Anna's son, Red.

Naturally, I got sick. A sinus infection with an absolutely overwhelming headache morphed into a fever and bronchitis. I'd visit a few blogs, comment, trying to work up to writing a post here, but every time I was too worn out to manage much. I will be announcing the winner of my fiction contest shortly, and I will be posting again on the "A Child Without A Voice" project. I just wanted to get this quick update up to let everyone know the reason for my long silence.

I will also replace the button I created with another, equally visible but hopefully of better quality. Please, if you want to leave comments on the project, go to the most recent post (which the button will always link to, even if that post is still on top) and leave your comment there. I am considering creating a short post, dated prior to the start of this blog, just to hold links to all the posts related to this project. Or creating a special section in the sidebar.

A Child Without A Voice

Not long ago, I posted about the plight of autistic children in many parts of the world, and asked what a writer could do to stop it. I still don't have an answer to the larger questions, but one comment started me thinking of one thing we can all do. No matter what else may happen in the world, we can each try to help one person at a time.

Anna's son, Red, has apraxia, which means he can't talk. And her health insurer has decided Red's need for a speech therapist doesn't qualify. So Anna read my post and said, "Children who can't speak. God, how I understand that subject."

Anna's comment left me thinking about her son. Too many people are seeking donations for too many needs for a button seeking donations through PayPal to do much good. It always seems easier to raise funds if you offer something in return; that's why bake sales and raffles are so popular. But what can a blogger offer? Well, a lot of bloggers are writers, or want to be.

The best idea I've had to date is to produce an anthology of short stories on one theme: "a child without a voice". When it's ready, put it up for sale on LuLu and publicize it all over the Internet, hoping enough kind souls will buy the book, knowing all the profits are going to a good cause. I was considering this idea when I read on Anna's blog it was Red's birthday.

I'd planned to take more time, so I could have everything worked out. But I just couldn't wait. When I brought my idea up in the comments, Anna mentioned that Red will be without therapy over the summer, when school ends. I'm not at all sure it's even possible to do this that quickly, but I've got to try. All I'm asking you to do is read on, and see if there's anything you'd be willing and able to help with.

I understand many of you have your own worries, but I do hope you'll at least keep up with this project so you can write a short post about it - (please read what's needed, first...) - to help get the word out. I know many of you who read this blog are friends, and I don't want to presume on our friendship, but I don't think it's asking too much to hope most of you will write a short post or two to help out. (And, if you have your reasons for not doing so, I'll understand and respect that.)

I'll give more details on the anthology in a few paragraphs, for anyone who might consider writing a story for it, but there are other points that need to be worked out so the book can be published. First of all, the book can't legally be published without an agreement written by someone who understands copyright law, granting rights for this project but allowing each author to retain the remaining rights to their own work. If possible, it should cover submissions from any country, and sales to any country as well.

There is also the problem of setting this up so neither Anna nor I winds up with a nasty surprise from the tax man, and so everyone who participates can be sure the money really goes to help Red. I wouldn't even begin to know how to do that. I'm also not sure if such an arrangement is possible under LuLu's current terms of use, or whether a special accommodation will be necessary there. I can probably find that out on my own, at least.

Most of you can't help with the legal questions, but if you do have a relationship with any blawgs, or happen to know a good lawyer who might donate a bit of time, I'd appreciate your help. I'll also be seeking help myself, but I already know this - if I could afford to pay the lawyers, I could pay for the therapy myself and spare myself all the work! I'm just hoping the legal issues can be broken down into smaller tasks, and there will be enough lawyers willing to help.

If any of you have thoughts on how to improve the project, increase the chances this will raise enough money, or get things done quickly enough to help out this summer, please leave a comment! I promise that sharing ideas won't obligate you to do anything more, unless you want to. And if you're willing to help publicize the book once it's out, just e-mail me at thewanderingauthor [at] yahoo [dot] com so I know and I'll e-mail you to alert you when it's time.

A few of you might be willing to write a story for the anthology, and I'm hoping the rest of you might write a short post pointing my project out to anyone who might consider it. A lot of publicity is not good yet; that should wait until the book is ready for sale, or just before. But I do need to get the word out far enough to ensure enough submissions to make this work, and I'm hoping you'll each help there.

Now, what all the writers have been waiting for - the guidelines. You won't be paid for this, of course. And I'm going to try to produce as professional quality a book as possible. For a very few of my readers, that may mean I'd only need to proofread your manuscript. For most of you, I'll be editing your story (unless I can find a better editor) and I'll be merciless! You may learn a lot about cleaning up your prose, but I want you to be prepared.

And, no matter how good a friend you are, the important thing here is to help Red! So, if the story you submit isn't good enough, or it's late, I'm sorry, but I won't include it. Exactly how good the stories are will depend on who I can persuade to submit, and how soon I can get enough together for a book. So please, if you're a friend, don't expect special treatment.

I will consider stories of any length from flash fiction through novella (say, from as few words as you can pack a story into up to a maximum of about 25,000-30,000 words). If your story is over the limit, submit it anyway - chances are the prose will need pruning, and that will cut the word count. The more submissions I get, the better my chances of putting together a quality book that will serve the purpose well.

Please, don't worry about how good a writer you are! If you have the ability to get the raw material for a good story down on paper, I'll work with you to improve it if I need to. If I get enough submissions that need less work, then, yes, I'll pass you over. Again, the point here is to help a little boy who can't speak for himself, who can't do something as simple as just tell his mother he's terribly thirsty.

The theme of each story should be "a child without a voice". The child doesn't have to have apraxia, but they should literally be unable to speak so others can understand them. No allegories, or children who are just too afraid to speak, just children who share Red's plight, if not his condition. If your story ends with a solution, it shouldn't be too simple, and if you don't keep your story to roughly a PG-13 level, I'll edit it down to that.

At the moment, I'm considering several possible titles. Children Without Voices, The Words Just Will Not Come, and I Cannot Speak Up for Myself are the ideas I'm toying with right now, although that will probably change before publication. Feel free to submit ideas for a title, as well, or tell me what you think of the ideas under consideration. I'll be posting periodic updates, and there may be changes as I try to make this work as quickly as possible, but I'll try to put up a visible link to the most recent post, and provide a link back in that post to this one, so you can always keep up.

I close this with a final challenge - bloggers are viewed with disdain and disrespect by many people who don't blog. While helping Red is the most important part of this project, some of you could perhaps use a bit more motivation: this is a way to show the world what blogging can accomplish, and that bloggers can improve the world, one little bit at a time, if we put our minds to it.

The Wandering Author's Journey

I had hoped to post again long before this. One minor problem after another distracted me, and stole my time. I need to update my links; I haven't forgotten those of you I owe links to. I hope you'll forgive the delay. I originally intended to put in all the new links and add a new post, all at one time.

Of course, this would have required even more time, which was just what I've had so little of lately. Genealogy faces more and more hurdles as records are closed; the fact it is absurd, for example, to limit access to records from the 1800s due to concerns about "privacy" or "identity theft" doesn't matter. If you complain, you must "support the terrorists".

While I am opposed to anyone who would kill as recklessly as all terrorist organisations do, I find it hard to believe any of them intends to masquerade as a centenarian. Nevertheless, no individual can hold back the tide. Other difficulties, as well as a desire to return to writing, made me consider a new career.

Still, writers must eat while they work on their novels. Not long ago, an opportunity came my way which was more than I'd hoped for. I am not free to say much until all the details are worked out, and the agreements signed. However, I don't betray any confidences when I say simply I've been given the chance to work on a blog professionally.

It is not a writing blog, but it is something I consider worthwhile, for reasons I will explain once I am free to do so. It will also keep me busy writing, a practice that is always valuable. In addition, it is, simply, a choice I am convinced is the right one for me.

This is keeping me quite busy right now. I have not forgotten my plans, or my contest. So far, the entrants are few enough I should be able to judge it within a reasonable time. I already have one entry, and will be posting a review shortly. Eventually, when I am sure I can do so, I will go ahead with my plans for a blog focused on writing.

And well before any of that, I intend to be back here, adding the links I owe some of you, and posting at least fairly regularly. There may be times, when my work demands it, when there is still more of a gap between posts than I'd like. I hope that you, my loyal readers, will forgive me and continue to visit whenever you can.